Posted in Cakes, decoration

Tropical Traybake

Since nobody has been able to jet off to Benidorm or any other exotic location this year, it’s time to bring the sun to us with this tropical traybake.

This orange and passionfruit cake will provide the sunny vibes, but if you really want to recreate the ‘Brit on holiday’ experience, then you’ll also need to do the following:

  • wear a ridiculous tropical shirt (bonus points if it matches with the rest of your travel companions)
  • get up at the crack of dawn to ‘save the sunbeds’
  • burn to a crisp on the first day
  • say it’s boiling at least 17 times a day
  • learn how to say hello in the local language, then proceed to speak English

Before we get into the nitty gritty of the recipe, here is this week’s (very embarrassing) kitchen goss

Kitchen Goss

I can’t quite believe I’m exposing myself this much on KG, but this is too funny not to share.

So I recently rediscovered this voice memo I made in 2018 when I was revising for my chemistry A-level. I must’ve seen a pinterest thing on creative ways to revise or something, because something unholy possessed me to make a song about electrophilic addition.

Yes it’s to the tune of ‘These Words’ by Natasha Bedingfield

Yes it took me all day to write (and I couldn’t even make it rhyme)

Yes the full version of ‘Mechanisms Mix *flame*’ is available on soundcloud

I can’t bring myself to listen to the full thing, and safe to say I will never be doing that again.

Back to the bake…

Ingredients

  • FOR THE CAKE
  • 225g butter
  • 225g caster sugar
  • 4 eggs
  • 225g self raising flour
  • 1 orange – zested n juiced
  • 1tsp vanilla extract
  • FOR THE ICING
  • 150g butter
  • 300g icing sugar
  • 3tbsp passionfruit curd (or adjust to your taste)
  • 1tsp vanilla extract
  • gel food colourings

Method

  • whack your butter and shug in a bowl and beat until light and fluffy
  • add eggos one at a time
  • fold in flour, orange zest, vanilla and 3/4 of your orange juice (save the remaining quarter for icing time)
  • Whack this in whichever tray tickles your pickle, make sure to grease and line it
  • bake for 20-25 mins at 180C (or if your oven doesn’t have numbers on it like mine, then just take it out when it looks golden and a knife comes out clean when you poke it in)
  • Whilst that’s cooling you can crack on with the icing
  • whip up the butter and icing sugar
  • add the orange juice and passionfruit curd to your taste (it can be quite zingy)
  • if you want to decorate with painted buttercream flowers then split icing into bowls and add colourings of your choice (gel food colourings work best here)
  • once the cake is cool, remove from the tin and spread over a base layer of icing
  • Let this set up in the fridge – very important step otherwise going to be difficult to add more buttercream on top!
  • once harder to the touch, get the cake out and get creative
  • I ‘painted’ flowers onto mine, which is a technique I’ve been wanting to try out for ages, but go with whatever you feel looks fun n fresh

If you’re interested in how I decorated my traybake, then take a look at this very speedy vid below.

Thanks for reading, lots of luv, Han – KG x x x

Posted in decoration

Isomalt Splash

After my last post (https://bitchesthatbake.home.blog/2020/09/11/lemon-celebration-cake/) I received thousands of messages begging me to put up a tutorial on how to make the isomalt splash which decorated the top. I’m just giving the fans what they want x

Isomalt is a sugar alcohol (not the kind you can get sloshed on though 😦 ) and when it cools it sets like hard candy – perfect for sugar art. It can be blown into little bubbles, made into delicate flowers, or in this case, slopped around to make a splash.

Before we begin, here’s the KG.

Kitchen Goss

The one accessory which should feature in every fashionista’s wardrobe: Primark’s Disney dog outfit range.

If you have a below average sized head and want to stand out from the crowd, then the small dog costumes will be right up your street. Slip into one of these and everyone will want to PET THAT DAWG.

Of course the stitch costume was whipped out after an incredibly *classy* bottomless brunch with my sistaz. The real question is though, who wore it better – me, Melis or the rat (Gregg)????

It’s the snorting for me x

Anyway, moving on. I’ve made a cheeky vid for you all instead of just a written recipe – keepin up with the tech for kids these days. Pls enjoy.

Ingredients

  • isomalt (ready tempered, clear, just get on amazon)
  • gel food colouring
  • silicone mat (this is needed)
  • bottle of some kind

Method

  • Pop a few isomalt balls in a heatproof bowl
  • chuck in the microwave and blast in 30second intervals until bubbling
  • be really careful because it is literal molten sugar and can say from experience it hurts if you touch it
  • add in any colouring you want at this point
  • you might have to blast in the microwave again to get really hot (it sets up super quick so you have to move fast)
  • pour your bubbling isomalt onto your silicone mat
  • start to tip the mat to spread it around
  • when the isomalt has cooled slightly on the mat (30 secs) lay the mat over a bottle and hold in the desired shape
  • wait a couple of minutes until the isomalt has set hard
  • carefully remove the bottle and peel off the silicone mat – take your time you don’t want to crack your masterpiece
  • and that’s it!!! Pop it on top of your cake, sit back n chillax

And that’s everything my lovelies. Posts may be on the slow side for a while because my oven at uni is a genuine candle but I’ll see what I can rustle up.

Thanks for reading

Much love, Han, BTB x x x x x x

Posted in decoration

Italian Meringue Buttercream

Not overly sweet and smoother than my chat up lines – you won’t go back to the basic buttercream after getting your nashers round this.

There are 3 main types of buttercream – American, Italian meringue and Swiss meringue. There are some other irrelevant ones but these are the 3 top dawgs.

Continue reading “Italian Meringue Buttercream”
Posted in decoration

How to hand-paint a cake

I like to think of cake as a blank canvas (but it’s so much better than an actual canvas because you can eat it afterwards).

There are so many techniques out there for decorating cakes, from sculpting fondant to mirror glazing. Hand painting is one that is not seen as often, but can result in a cake that’s (almost) as beautiful as you πŸ˜‰ x

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